Obesity, Weight Loss and Forgiveness
Forgiveness sets you free.
At first glance it might not seem particularly obvious that there is a relationship between forgiveness and issues like obesity and the consequent pressure to lose weight. When we look deeper into the inner causes of weight gain, such as; stress, comfort eating, and so on we can begin to see where forgiveness could indeed have relevance to the obesity issue as it can have a dramatic effect in increasing our feeling of wellbeing.
We could have got into the habit of using food as a way of filling up a gap where we feel there is something missing in our lives. If that ‘something missing’ is a sense of peace and wellbeing we may be using food as a substitute to comfort us for what we feel is lacking. If we accumulate experiences which we have not forgiven – which is an all too common phenomena – we can easily have created an internal climate, of thinking and feeling, which is judgmental and overly critical and therefore not conducive to a sense of wellbeing.
If we are not happy about our current weight and intensely want to be slimmer this may cause us to go to war on ourselves and attack ourselves with self-judgment and self-condemnation in an attempt to bully and force ourselves to lose weight. This creates a climate of guilt and shame which does not contribute to our long-term sense of wellbeing and can ultimately be self-defeating. Therefore, we not only reduce our sense of wellbeing by not forgiving others; we then reduce our sense of wellbeing even further by the lack of compassion and of forgiveness that we have towards ourselves.
An unkind attitude towards life usually includes being unforgiving of others and ourselves. In other words an unforgiving attitude and an unkind attitude usually go hand in hand. This unkind/unforgiving attitude may become our normal way of looking at life and other people. However, this unkind attitude and the unforgiving thoughts and feelings that support it, does not create a feeling of wellbeing within us. We may have great successes in life, but an unkind and unforgiving attitude will stop these bringing us much satisfaction for long.
We may know lots of people but not feel that we have any real friends (ie people who would guard our back if we were in trouble) if we have an unforgiving attitude – especially if we are unforgiving of ourselves. This is because we are not a friend to ourselves, so we feel theres is something missing. What is missing is the one who should be our best friend – which is ourselves.
Being a friend to ourselves does not mean indulging every whim. It means creating a wholesome discipline and being honest with ourselves about the real inner causes, in the form of thoughts and feelings, behind our outer behavior. It means then taking the necessary steps to heal those inner causes so that we can find peace and wellbeing. Once we begin to establish a sense of connection with ourselves, from the perspective of taking a kindly interest in our own growth and development as a person, a sense of peace and wellbeing can begin to influence our actions. Those actions which do not support our wellbeing will naturally start to fall away and we find ourselves developing other interests.
Through forgiveness we learn to lose the heavy psychological “weight” of old pains, old guilts and old shames. We slim down our way of looking ourselves and life and shed the unnecessary and unhelpful perceptions that we have been caryying around from the past. When we learn to include how we think and how we feel in our “diet plan”, and use methods such as The Four Steps to Forgiveness, to restrict our indulgence in unhappy thoughts and feelings, we start to break up the old patterns behind addictive behaviour and give ourselves a chance to feed on healther thoughts and feelings.
Learning how to forgive is a very powerful and effective key to creating a wholesome discipline and to help us resolve issues which we were struggling with. Learning to forgive others and to forgive ourselves allows us to resolve those outstanding issues which are silently fueling our addictions and compulsions and allows us to let them go. It allows us to break out of old patterns of feeling a sense of lack, or resentment, about what others have done, or not done, in our lives. Learning to forgive helps us to find a feeling of fulness, satisfaction and fulfillment which we were simply looking for in the wrong places. Of course, you will still want to create a healthy diet plan to help you lose weight, but forgiveness may well help you feel much better about yourself and make it easier for you stick to your plan.
To learn how to forgive, download the free ebook, The Four Steps to Forgiveness, available on this page. (You get it immediately – no need to even enter an email address).
Good luck and may you find your way to the peace and wellbeing that you rightfully deserve.
William —- William Fergus Martin
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Four Steps to Forgiveness
Four Steps to Forgiveness
A powerful way to freedom, happiness and success.
William Fergus Martin